Are you stressed? Do you need a time out? Have you been going out every night with your friends to try and relax but it's just not working? Well now there's a new product you can try! (Stupid infomercials....)
"The latest James Bond movie was showing on the hotel's in-house movie service. She smiled to herself as she thought about Daniel Craig in his swim trunks. Sugar, salt and a buff man - not a bad night in......She grabbed a spoon from the minibar and ripped the top off the ice cream. She needed to keep an eye on her temper around him. And she had to stop letting him get under her skin. That, or she had to somehow develop Zen-like mind-body control so she could stop herself from blushing in front of him. Large quantities of chocolate-chip ice cream went a long way to calming her. She turned on the TV and opened the corn chips. An hour into the movie, she was blinking and yawning. When the movie cut to a love scene, she decided to call it quits for the night. She liked watching James run and jump and beat people up, but she wasn't so wild about the mandatory sex scenes. She knew other people liked them, even got disappointed when they didn't get enough of them, but she so didn't get it."
Ok, so I kept going because, hello, JAMES BOND! Nonetheless, DANIEL CRAIG as JAMES BOND! I'm gonna plug this book and others like it because, as a woman, I LOVE THEM! Smut, as my high school English teacher would call it. If you've never read any books from the Blaze series by Harlequin Publishers, you're seriously missing out. And they'd be a great addition to your "you time," ladies! Men, go get a Hustler. (Just kidding....Maxim is much more tasteful anyway.)
Point is, sometimes you need "you time," no matter what your situation is. There could be nothing wrong, you're just having a lack of energy and motivation and it's infiltrating your time with your friends. It doesn't have to be a whole day, a whole night, a whole morning, or even a whole hour. You need complete commitment to having "you time." If you're not quite sure what will make you feel better, do some trial and error. For me, that means taco bell chalupas, coke or sweet tea (depending on my mood), dark chocolate Lindt lindor truffles, and Legally Blond, The Lizzie McGuire Movie, or James Bond (if not Daniel Craig then Sean Connery will do. Ghost Adventures is a good substitute, too. Nick Groff's head on Zak Bagans's hot bod? Yes, please!) Maybe you're craving a certain food or cuisine. Don't go crazy, but enjoy that cuisine. If it doesn't hit the spot, try something else next time. However, DO NOT get disappointed when you feel like you failed at "you time." It's still time to yourself, which is truly what you need.
Rules:
1. Completely commit to the amount of time you want to spend alone. Determine a time frame or a certain event.
2. TURN OFF COMMUNICATION!! Cell phones, Facebook, e-mail, pagers (if those even exist anymore, and if you have one, welcome to the 21st century!). Turn off everything. "You time" is "you time." It's not about anyone else.
3. If you're seriously stressing over something and can't stop thinking about it, have a convo with your imaginary friend or write it down. Be completely honest, tell the ENTIRE truth, and say everything you'd ever want to say. This is a way of getting it out of your system. Detox is a wonderful thing.
4. Get what you need before you start "you time." If that means corn chips and chocolate-chip ice cream, get it BEFORE you cage yourself in. It doesn't work to be disrupted and have to get comfortable all over again.
5. STAY THERE. Truly enjoy your time and truly accomplish everything you want to accomplish during "you time." (How many times have I said "you time" now?) If that means you want to paint your nails, pig out, watch a movie, clean the house, and download some new music (legally, of course ;) ), then do it ALL!
6. Make sure you truly enjoy your time. Like I said before, don't get disappointed because something doesn't hit the spot. Eventually you'll figure out exactly what that means for you, and "you time" will just be even more special. Simply focus on the fact that you've done something for yourself. Moms, you know what I'm talking about!
Exceptions. Obviously, there are exceptions to every rule, so there will be exceptions to these. Here are just a few:
1. Don't go crazy. Enjoy foods and drinks, but don't become dependent on them or overload on them. Feeling like you-know-what in the morning is never fun.
2. Don't completely shut yourself out all of the time. "You time" should be consistent, but solitary confinement is never the way to solve your problems. Unless you're a mass murderer....then we may have a problem....
3. If you have someone you are needing to hear from, keep your cell phone on, but change the settings. If you can set personal ringtones, set the default to silent and set one for the person you're needing to hear from. Silent includes texts, emails, picture messages, voicemails, etc.
4. Don't cheat. Just because someone does contact you or comes over to just chit-chat it up doesn't mean you have to stop your "you time." Unless they're in danger or complete hysterics, tell them you'll catch them later.
5. This does not apply to the ten minutes before bed time. That's a given that you'd be alone and doing what you need to do, but you have a mission then. It's not for your personal enjoyment. Seriously go back to rule #1 and commit to "you time."
All-in-all to say, if you aren't happy, try reconnecting with who you are. Go back to the old stuff you used to love or try something new. You never know what a couple hours could do to boost your mood. And by the way, I have now said "you time" 15 times. Yeah, it's that important.
XOXO,
Gayle
Friday, January 20, 2012
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Lean On Me
Listen to this video on loop while you read. And really listen to the words. Oh, and if it starts playing "The Ides of March" trailer as your advertisement, watch it before you continue. Ryan Gosling and GEORGE CLOONEY!! Yum. Dibs on Clooney. Don't even try me. You can have Ryan.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPoTGyWT0Cg
Ok. Obviously, the majority of my posts are about romance, but this one, in fact, spreads to ALL aspects of life. You can probably guess what I will say, but you know you need a refresher. Ready, set, go.
There are people in your life that you lean on. There are people in your life that lean on you. Think about what you go to them for. After a fight with your boyfriend? Drama with your BFF? (IDK my BFF Jill) School kicking your butt? Some idiot dumped you because they don't know how good you are? But what about those embarassing, shameful things you need help with? What if you make an embarassing, dumb mistake? What if you don't know who the guy is, but you think you may be pregnant? What if you don't have money and are seriously struggling to get by? What if you question your faith? Who will you turn to? Do you turn to anyone? What do you say? Do you tell the whole truth? I know there are a lot of questions here, but everything we do stems from a question. So when someone asks you, "Are you ok? Do you need help?," what do you say?
I've been there. I've been so far gone and struggling to the point of quitting. And I will admit, I was never the one who actually asked for help in the long run. The only help I ever asked for was prayer. But I did get help, and I realized how much people love me, care for me, and want to see me succeed. Do you realize that? Do you realize how much people love YOU, care for YOU, and want YOU to succeed?
All of us struggle at one point or another, and we feel like a pebble that people kick around on the walkway. We feel ashamed, embarrassed, lost, hopeless, lonely. We hold back parts of the truth, and even sometimes all of the truth. We say, "Oh, I'm fine" when we're dying inside. We say, "Today's a good day" when we want to crawl back in bed and cry.
NEWS FLASH: YOU ARE HUMAN!!!!!!!!
Everyone goes through it. If you need help, ask for it! Don't be afraid of rejection, because when one door closes, another opens. And maybe not a door. Maybe it's a foggy window that becomes clear. Maybe it's a streaked mirror that becomes clean. Maybe it's a hole in the roof that becomes a beautiful skylight. Right now, you may be a caterpillar, trapped in a cocoon. But guess what? (Chicken butt!)
Go throw up now, because I'm about to be so cliche it disgusts even me.
You are going to become a beautiful butterfly! You are going to spread your wings and soar! It may take only 10 days if you're a Monarch. It may take 14 days if you are a Snow Fly. It may take 21 days if you're a Red Tipped Moth. It may take a year if you're the very hungry caterpillar because your cocoon is GIGANTIC! No matter what, you will emerge from that cocoon! You will break free from resistance and the low! You will get to soar above the clouds and be admired by all!
Ok, cliche-ness finished. In all seriousness, if you need help, do not be ashamed to ask for it. I usually won't do this, but it really seems to fit. You don't have to believe in God to know that you will make it through the toughest trials. Rules will follow.
1 Kings 3:5-13 (NKJV)
5 At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon in a dream by night; and God said, "Ask! What shall I give you?"
6 And Solomon said: "You have shown great mercy to Your servant David my father, because he walked before You in truth, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart with You; You have continued this great kindness for him, and You have given him a son to sit on his throne, as it is this day. 7 Now, O LORD my God, You have made Your servant king instead of my father David, but I am a little child; I do not know how to go out or come in. 8 And Your servant is in the midst of Your people whom You have chosen, a great people, too numerous to be numbered or counted. 9 Therefore give to Your servant an understanding heart to judge Your people, that I may discern between good and evil. For who is able to judge this great people of Yours?"
10 The speech pleased the Lord, that Solomon had asked this thing. 11 Then God said to him: "Because you have asked this thing, and have not asked long life for yourself, nor have asked riches for yourself, nor have asked the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern justice, 12 behold, I have done according to your words; see, I have given you a wise and understanding heart, so that there has not been anyone like you before you, nor shall any like you arise after you. 13 And I have also given you what you have not asked: both riches and honor, so that there shall not be anyone like you among the kings all your days.
RULES:
1. Be honest with yourself and with others.
2. Know the root of your problem, not just what you think will fix it.
3. Know that you are NEVER out of options.
4. Ask for help. Whether it be from God, your BFF Jill, or a complete stranger, ask for help when you need it.
5. Have faith and trust that everyone goes through tough times and that you will come through it.
Now, smile! As Marcel the Shell says, "Guess why I smile a lot? Because it's worth it."
XOXO,
Gayle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPoTGyWT0Cg
Ok. Obviously, the majority of my posts are about romance, but this one, in fact, spreads to ALL aspects of life. You can probably guess what I will say, but you know you need a refresher. Ready, set, go.
There are people in your life that you lean on. There are people in your life that lean on you. Think about what you go to them for. After a fight with your boyfriend? Drama with your BFF? (IDK my BFF Jill) School kicking your butt? Some idiot dumped you because they don't know how good you are? But what about those embarassing, shameful things you need help with? What if you make an embarassing, dumb mistake? What if you don't know who the guy is, but you think you may be pregnant? What if you don't have money and are seriously struggling to get by? What if you question your faith? Who will you turn to? Do you turn to anyone? What do you say? Do you tell the whole truth? I know there are a lot of questions here, but everything we do stems from a question. So when someone asks you, "Are you ok? Do you need help?," what do you say?
I've been there. I've been so far gone and struggling to the point of quitting. And I will admit, I was never the one who actually asked for help in the long run. The only help I ever asked for was prayer. But I did get help, and I realized how much people love me, care for me, and want to see me succeed. Do you realize that? Do you realize how much people love YOU, care for YOU, and want YOU to succeed?
All of us struggle at one point or another, and we feel like a pebble that people kick around on the walkway. We feel ashamed, embarrassed, lost, hopeless, lonely. We hold back parts of the truth, and even sometimes all of the truth. We say, "Oh, I'm fine" when we're dying inside. We say, "Today's a good day" when we want to crawl back in bed and cry.
NEWS FLASH: YOU ARE HUMAN!!!!!!!!
Everyone goes through it. If you need help, ask for it! Don't be afraid of rejection, because when one door closes, another opens. And maybe not a door. Maybe it's a foggy window that becomes clear. Maybe it's a streaked mirror that becomes clean. Maybe it's a hole in the roof that becomes a beautiful skylight. Right now, you may be a caterpillar, trapped in a cocoon. But guess what? (Chicken butt!)
Go throw up now, because I'm about to be so cliche it disgusts even me.
You are going to become a beautiful butterfly! You are going to spread your wings and soar! It may take only 10 days if you're a Monarch. It may take 14 days if you are a Snow Fly. It may take 21 days if you're a Red Tipped Moth. It may take a year if you're the very hungry caterpillar because your cocoon is GIGANTIC! No matter what, you will emerge from that cocoon! You will break free from resistance and the low! You will get to soar above the clouds and be admired by all!
Ok, cliche-ness finished. In all seriousness, if you need help, do not be ashamed to ask for it. I usually won't do this, but it really seems to fit. You don't have to believe in God to know that you will make it through the toughest trials. Rules will follow.
1 Kings 3:5-13 (NKJV)
5 At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon in a dream by night; and God said, "Ask! What shall I give you?"
6 And Solomon said: "You have shown great mercy to Your servant David my father, because he walked before You in truth, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart with You; You have continued this great kindness for him, and You have given him a son to sit on his throne, as it is this day. 7 Now, O LORD my God, You have made Your servant king instead of my father David, but I am a little child; I do not know how to go out or come in. 8 And Your servant is in the midst of Your people whom You have chosen, a great people, too numerous to be numbered or counted. 9 Therefore give to Your servant an understanding heart to judge Your people, that I may discern between good and evil. For who is able to judge this great people of Yours?"
10 The speech pleased the Lord, that Solomon had asked this thing. 11 Then God said to him: "Because you have asked this thing, and have not asked long life for yourself, nor have asked riches for yourself, nor have asked the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern justice, 12 behold, I have done according to your words; see, I have given you a wise and understanding heart, so that there has not been anyone like you before you, nor shall any like you arise after you. 13 And I have also given you what you have not asked: both riches and honor, so that there shall not be anyone like you among the kings all your days.
RULES:
1. Be honest with yourself and with others.
2. Know the root of your problem, not just what you think will fix it.
3. Know that you are NEVER out of options.
4. Ask for help. Whether it be from God, your BFF Jill, or a complete stranger, ask for help when you need it.
5. Have faith and trust that everyone goes through tough times and that you will come through it.
Now, smile! As Marcel the Shell says, "Guess why I smile a lot? Because it's worth it."
XOXO,
Gayle
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
show AND tell
Have you ever watched "Dance Moms," "American Idol" or "Toddlers and Tiaras?" Have you ever noticed the blunt, point-blank criticism people receive? I'm not wanting to get into ethics of whether it's right or wrong to really tell the truth to young children as they grow and develop their talents. I want you to solely think about how much truth-telling you really do and how much it would help or hurt you to be told and tell the God-honest truth.
Now, no, this isn't about the ethics of truth-telling. It is, in fact, about love and relationships. We all know honesty is the key to any relationship. You can't have a happy relationship without honesty. No one is happy when they are lied to. So ladies, when you want your man to do the dishes or get you something special for your anniversary, does beating around the bush really work? Men, when you want your queen to go out with her girlfriends while you and the boys down some beer and watch some ball, what do you say?
Those are very casual situations, of course. The real problem is when there's an issue in the relationship. The most common thing I hear is this situation:
Girl meets boy. Boy likes girl. Boy asks girl out. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy or girl leaves for vacation. Boy stops calling or texting or XOXOing girl as often as he used to. Girl beats around the bush to tell him to step it up. Boy doesn't catch the drift. Girl gets upset but can't tell him again for fear he'll get annoyed at her nagging.
Right? Dumb. (No offense, ladies, and gentlemen, you're not always to blame.) I've been on both sides of the story. Recently, I was the one who stopped calling, texting and XOXOing. Granted, we weren't together at the time, but he never told me straight up "I want you to talk to me" until later. I felt bad and now I don't leave him alone.
So what do you do without being a you-know-what or a donkey? Establishing honesty from the get-go is the most important thing. If you can't be honest, you're not going to get what you want or need out of the relationship. It's plain and simple - no honesty, no happiness. Sure, I realize not all of you are just starting out in your relationship and many of you are well into your relationship. But you're still having issues that involve honesty.
Realize that the title of this blog is "show AND tell." Just telling someone the honest truth isn't going to solve everything. When you tell someone something, there's motivation, there's something to get out of it. TELL your loved one with all honesty what you need. But the second half is SHOW. You have to show your loved one that you love them. That doesn't mean diamonds, chocolates and roses every day (though that would make ANY girl's day!). It could be as simple as an "XOXO" text in the middle of the day, a sticky note on his steering wheel reminding him about dinner with your parents and then showing him how much you appreciated his cool demeanor during your father's "jokes," a "good morning" kiss, an "I love you" hug when he's cooking dinner or she stole the remote from you once again to watch "The Bachelor."
Yeah yeah yeah, lovey dovey, blah blah, grossness. You know you love it and you know your loved one loves it. So, two rules:
1. BE HONEST. ABSOLUTELY NO BEATING AROUND THE BUSH. DONT "ISH" IT!
2. Even if there's nothing to say, you can say everything through a little PDA. Don't worry, she wore bronzer so she really is blushing. Feel free to continue.
XOXO,
Gayle
Now, no, this isn't about the ethics of truth-telling. It is, in fact, about love and relationships. We all know honesty is the key to any relationship. You can't have a happy relationship without honesty. No one is happy when they are lied to. So ladies, when you want your man to do the dishes or get you something special for your anniversary, does beating around the bush really work? Men, when you want your queen to go out with her girlfriends while you and the boys down some beer and watch some ball, what do you say?
Those are very casual situations, of course. The real problem is when there's an issue in the relationship. The most common thing I hear is this situation:
Girl meets boy. Boy likes girl. Boy asks girl out. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy or girl leaves for vacation. Boy stops calling or texting or XOXOing girl as often as he used to. Girl beats around the bush to tell him to step it up. Boy doesn't catch the drift. Girl gets upset but can't tell him again for fear he'll get annoyed at her nagging.
Right? Dumb. (No offense, ladies, and gentlemen, you're not always to blame.) I've been on both sides of the story. Recently, I was the one who stopped calling, texting and XOXOing. Granted, we weren't together at the time, but he never told me straight up "I want you to talk to me" until later. I felt bad and now I don't leave him alone.
So what do you do without being a you-know-what or a donkey? Establishing honesty from the get-go is the most important thing. If you can't be honest, you're not going to get what you want or need out of the relationship. It's plain and simple - no honesty, no happiness. Sure, I realize not all of you are just starting out in your relationship and many of you are well into your relationship. But you're still having issues that involve honesty.
Realize that the title of this blog is "show AND tell." Just telling someone the honest truth isn't going to solve everything. When you tell someone something, there's motivation, there's something to get out of it. TELL your loved one with all honesty what you need. But the second half is SHOW. You have to show your loved one that you love them. That doesn't mean diamonds, chocolates and roses every day (though that would make ANY girl's day!). It could be as simple as an "XOXO" text in the middle of the day, a sticky note on his steering wheel reminding him about dinner with your parents and then showing him how much you appreciated his cool demeanor during your father's "jokes," a "good morning" kiss, an "I love you" hug when he's cooking dinner or she stole the remote from you once again to watch "The Bachelor."
Yeah yeah yeah, lovey dovey, blah blah, grossness. You know you love it and you know your loved one loves it. So, two rules:
1. BE HONEST. ABSOLUTELY NO BEATING AROUND THE BUSH. DONT "ISH" IT!
2. Even if there's nothing to say, you can say everything through a little PDA. Don't worry, she wore bronzer so she really is blushing. Feel free to continue.
XOXO,
Gayle
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
A New Year, A New You?
2012 is upon us, and Lord knows we're all ready to start over in some way. But does it always have to be a new and improved you? Does it always have to be a complete do-over? Do you always have to have goals for the fiscal year alone?
Resolutions are great, but not just because it's a New Year. Resolutions give you happiness and a sense of calm once they are attained. There are the classic troubles that everyone reflects upon when the New Year hits - finances, marriages, relationships, business relations, health and fitness. But what should you really focus on this time around? (If you started singing Frank Sinatra's "The Second Time Around," I love you.)
Questions to ask yourself as this new year starts:
1. Am I really wanting a new year or am I wanting a new adventure?
2. How much good can I do for others in one year?
3. What will really put my sense of success over the moon?
4. Am I rushing or focusing on time to the point of missing out on precious moments?
This is not something I frequent. I really don't ask myself these questions. But reflecting on 2011, I had a great year, but it ended in an awful situation. I'm not sure how to survive life or how to fix the problems I'm having. So are resolutions really what I need? No. The "new and improved" me needs to be more improved than new. So here are some questions I'm asking myself.
1. Am I really wanting a new year or am I wanting a new adventure?
As a Senior in college, I am about to graduate this coming May. I have five months left to finish what I started. I don't go anywhere from here except the daily grind, and that does not excite me. I don't need a new year - I've had twenty two wonderful years so far, full of memories, adventures and failures. A new year isn't going to help anything. The world doesn't end and I get to pick and choose how this new year runs its course. Holy cow, how I wish that was how this universe worked.....but nooooooo. It doesn't work that way. A new adventure is exactly what I'm craving. Granted, I want to move home and go back to my old jobs this coming Summer, which isn't a new adventure at all (Unless you want to count potty-training a new class of three-year-olds an adventure, which is definitely an experience unto itself.). However, after this last semester proved to be a strong change of heart, some consistency and a good solid reminder of where I came from is exactly what I need for this new adventure to really take the effect I'm wanting it to take. So here's to a new year? No, thank you. Here's to a new me? Not happening. Here's to a new adventure? Yes, please!
2. How much good can I do for others in just one year?
I've always wanted to establish an organization that aids war veterans and military personnel with surprise visits home or transportation to their home when their families cannot provide it. How cool would that be - to be one of the first people to see someone who spends their time serving our country and giving us freedom and put a smile on their face and let them know they're loved *cue rabbit* This could be the year I do that, though our soldiers have been pulled out of Iraq, but it could still work, who knows? I've always wanted to adopt a child or be a surrogate mother, but that's not an option right now - maybe 2016? I do know I want to travel and see the world, but that doesn't benefit others. I would love to be a motivational speaker and help others on career choices, secondary education choices, and other things. *snatch rabbit* Anyway, I know I want to do things for others. So how much can I get away with in the 365 days of 2012?
3. What will really put my sense of success over the moon?
I am successful. I'm almost finished with my college education, I have an amazing family, I have spectacular friends, and I feel loved. That is really all I want out of life - to love and to be loved. Simple yet so hard! Sure, there's unconditional love, but how much do we really show each other how much we love each other? (Redundant, I know, but it serves a point.) There is so much more I want out of life, though. Now that I am about to graduate, I'm ready to have a smooth transition into adulthood. I probably won't be getting a job with my degree, and if I do, that's wonderful, but if I don't, I want to begin establishing myself in the community. As it comes with helping others, it also comes with responsibilities. I want to prove to myself and to others that I am ready for this responsibility. I also want to finally lose the weight I've always wanted to lose. As this is a new adventure for me, if I can pull it off, that will send my sense of success over the moon. Now, that's a big feat, and I'm ready for the challenge, but even the first ten pounds will send it soaring and on its way to orbit.
4. Am I rushing or focusing on time to the point of missing out on precious moments?
Yes. I know I am. After the change of heart early this past semester, I was rushing to get through the end that I missed out on really appreciating the time I had with the students I was with. What do you rush through? Does your teething baby keep you up at night and you find quick aids to "shut them up" instead of taking the extra time to interact with them and keep their mind off of the pain? Is your job unsatisfying and you do the basics on your work instead of rising to the top? Does your job and want for success consume your life to the point of missing holidays and vacations with family and friends? I know, I'm sounding like a commercial now. "Do you cut, rip and tear and your brownies never come out square? Do you need a hand? Now there's the Perfect Brownie Pan!" Mmmm, brownies.....*snatch rabbit* The point is, life is not about how much time you spend on this Earth or how much money you make. It's about the memories you make. You will always have memories. You won't always have money or material things. You could lose everything you own tomorrow, and all you'll have left is your family and friends. Those memories will keep you going and motivate you to turn the new leaf.
All to say, what does this new year really mean to you? "Auld lang syne" loosely means "for old times' sake." For old times' sake, what will you do this year?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne!
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne.
We'll take a cup of kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.
Gotta say, though, all this "Happy New Year!" hype gets me going with the champagne and fireworks and sparkly lights and kissing and lovey-dovey-ness and...*sigh*...it really is wonderful, no matter that I've never had a New Year's kiss. I don't need it. I only need the memories.
Happy New Year!
XOXO,
Gayle
Resolutions are great, but not just because it's a New Year. Resolutions give you happiness and a sense of calm once they are attained. There are the classic troubles that everyone reflects upon when the New Year hits - finances, marriages, relationships, business relations, health and fitness. But what should you really focus on this time around? (If you started singing Frank Sinatra's "The Second Time Around," I love you.)
Questions to ask yourself as this new year starts:
1. Am I really wanting a new year or am I wanting a new adventure?
2. How much good can I do for others in one year?
3. What will really put my sense of success over the moon?
4. Am I rushing or focusing on time to the point of missing out on precious moments?
This is not something I frequent. I really don't ask myself these questions. But reflecting on 2011, I had a great year, but it ended in an awful situation. I'm not sure how to survive life or how to fix the problems I'm having. So are resolutions really what I need? No. The "new and improved" me needs to be more improved than new. So here are some questions I'm asking myself.
1. Am I really wanting a new year or am I wanting a new adventure?
As a Senior in college, I am about to graduate this coming May. I have five months left to finish what I started. I don't go anywhere from here except the daily grind, and that does not excite me. I don't need a new year - I've had twenty two wonderful years so far, full of memories, adventures and failures. A new year isn't going to help anything. The world doesn't end and I get to pick and choose how this new year runs its course. Holy cow, how I wish that was how this universe worked.....but nooooooo. It doesn't work that way. A new adventure is exactly what I'm craving. Granted, I want to move home and go back to my old jobs this coming Summer, which isn't a new adventure at all (Unless you want to count potty-training a new class of three-year-olds an adventure, which is definitely an experience unto itself.). However, after this last semester proved to be a strong change of heart, some consistency and a good solid reminder of where I came from is exactly what I need for this new adventure to really take the effect I'm wanting it to take. So here's to a new year? No, thank you. Here's to a new me? Not happening. Here's to a new adventure? Yes, please!
2. How much good can I do for others in just one year?
I've always wanted to establish an organization that aids war veterans and military personnel with surprise visits home or transportation to their home when their families cannot provide it. How cool would that be - to be one of the first people to see someone who spends their time serving our country and giving us freedom and put a smile on their face and let them know they're loved *cue rabbit* This could be the year I do that, though our soldiers have been pulled out of Iraq, but it could still work, who knows? I've always wanted to adopt a child or be a surrogate mother, but that's not an option right now - maybe 2016? I do know I want to travel and see the world, but that doesn't benefit others. I would love to be a motivational speaker and help others on career choices, secondary education choices, and other things. *snatch rabbit* Anyway, I know I want to do things for others. So how much can I get away with in the 365 days of 2012?
3. What will really put my sense of success over the moon?
I am successful. I'm almost finished with my college education, I have an amazing family, I have spectacular friends, and I feel loved. That is really all I want out of life - to love and to be loved. Simple yet so hard! Sure, there's unconditional love, but how much do we really show each other how much we love each other? (Redundant, I know, but it serves a point.) There is so much more I want out of life, though. Now that I am about to graduate, I'm ready to have a smooth transition into adulthood. I probably won't be getting a job with my degree, and if I do, that's wonderful, but if I don't, I want to begin establishing myself in the community. As it comes with helping others, it also comes with responsibilities. I want to prove to myself and to others that I am ready for this responsibility. I also want to finally lose the weight I've always wanted to lose. As this is a new adventure for me, if I can pull it off, that will send my sense of success over the moon. Now, that's a big feat, and I'm ready for the challenge, but even the first ten pounds will send it soaring and on its way to orbit.
4. Am I rushing or focusing on time to the point of missing out on precious moments?
Yes. I know I am. After the change of heart early this past semester, I was rushing to get through the end that I missed out on really appreciating the time I had with the students I was with. What do you rush through? Does your teething baby keep you up at night and you find quick aids to "shut them up" instead of taking the extra time to interact with them and keep their mind off of the pain? Is your job unsatisfying and you do the basics on your work instead of rising to the top? Does your job and want for success consume your life to the point of missing holidays and vacations with family and friends? I know, I'm sounding like a commercial now. "Do you cut, rip and tear and your brownies never come out square? Do you need a hand? Now there's the Perfect Brownie Pan!" Mmmm, brownies.....*snatch rabbit* The point is, life is not about how much time you spend on this Earth or how much money you make. It's about the memories you make. You will always have memories. You won't always have money or material things. You could lose everything you own tomorrow, and all you'll have left is your family and friends. Those memories will keep you going and motivate you to turn the new leaf.
All to say, what does this new year really mean to you? "Auld lang syne" loosely means "for old times' sake." For old times' sake, what will you do this year?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne!
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne.
We'll take a cup of kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.
Gotta say, though, all this "Happy New Year!" hype gets me going with the champagne and fireworks and sparkly lights and kissing and lovey-dovey-ness and...*sigh*...it really is wonderful, no matter that I've never had a New Year's kiss. I don't need it. I only need the memories.
Happy New Year!
XOXO,
Gayle
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